The come down.

So i realized that all  i want to do and be I can do it. I can even do all my writing adn creativity no uplifted but I will just have to push myself to actually do it. I can, Im sad I sent my resume to a hostel cause I wan tot be a front desk person there and They never called and I sent it on tuesday. :(. I really wanted to that job, i need a second one because i dont think im getting enough hours this week. Im scared it will stay like this al summer. Plus when i have less time to sit around I actually make use of my time. Shit I wanted to go to to yoga today and didnt go. I think I can go at 12:30, I hope so, but im nervous I dont know why. i think Id rather starts over after this weekend. I think that way I will feel pretty. I am going to go on my roof soon. I miss my friends. I know ive been more social and stuff lately, but I want to be really social, where every other night so one is asking me to do something.  Im going to be playing around with my writing style. Dude, Im buying a hoop. Im so excited. I need to stop spending money that is what i need to do. or get a second job, I think I rather have a second job. i just want to have so much fun.  I dont even know where to look anymore tho. Im also being scared and of what i have no idea. Man I feel tired. I should of got a coffee to go. I want lemons for later.