What a day...

I loved today. I dont know exactly why. I think it is because I was really social to day. Along with a balanced day, I had a busy filled and active day. I went to blue bottle to do a cupping, which was just the  most amazing way to start the day. Than had a plant burger at The Plant, ha ha. It was pretty tasty and got to see a much of people I loved to work with. They made me feel special. Thank you!! Thank all of you who sent me positive energy to me on my birthday. I really appreciate all the kind thoughts.

Speaking of kind thoughts, Id like to give my positive energy and wishes to the Schaber family. I love you, S. If you need anything, dont be afraid to ask for it. I know we aren't as close as You and M, but Im here for you and the same goes for your sis.

Along with the tasting and burger, I went on a two hour bike ride, from pier 3 back home. I went along the embarcadaro to polk, than headed to fort mason. I road along side the bay until golden gate birdge. I went across and back along the bridge than through the presidio to seacliff and back home down California/Bush. I think I forgot to say on my fixie, o yea!!! Once I learn to stop without my brake, Im going to be mad unstoppable.

Finish it off with a bowl of top ramen at Suzu, where I left my number with the waiter to give to a boy I had found attractive.  Than came home and eat the edible arrangement my mom got me. I love the people in my life.

Peace love and chicken grease

Caved...

I caved last night, I had a pizza and decided it wasnt right for me. When I stay up late, I get bored therefore I eat. I definitely enjoyed the pizza but didnt need it or really want it once i had it. I cant believe I broke it with a piece of pizza haha, man its time to figure me out. I cant keep doing this to myself. Because now my crazy pride is making me want to do it again and just start over. I cant do the taste though. The last cup I had almost bad me throw up. So I think that is a sign. I can do it though. Man the indecision of my life. I think I learn a lot here. I need to learn to cook and socialize. Ok lesson learned, next step getting tune up on bike and being better with my word. And gym membership, maybe, if i can find the one I want to go too.

FML

i CANT MAKE DECISION AND i cant seem to go through with things. When did this beginning happening to me? cleansing and im hating it right now. I think i jsut want to EAT.. I just may. fuck this

Cleanse day 1

Lets just say Cayenne pepper coming out the other end is about the same as it grazing the back of your throat and lips; it simply burns. I really want to put real food in my body though but other than the burning sensation and the flavor, the cleanse itself is not that bad; all that capiscin is keeping feeling good.  My sense of smell I think may also be improving, seeing as how I'm living vicariously through it when food passing by my nose.

I'm coming to realize food had more control of my life than I was aware of; yet, consciously I did not pay much attention to it. I never notice the smells certain foods give off or how something actually taste. Just like my life, running from one place to the next and never sitting down to relax, is how I enjoyed my food. If you can call that enjoying. I never let the delicate  mixture of chemicals sink in or enjoy the delightful flavors one experiences when all that hard work is dissolving on your pallet. If I receive nothing more than  gaining a greater passion for food and all the process that come with, than Ill be waiting for the day I get to enjoy a meal I've made. Until than I raise my class of lemon, cayenne, and maple syrup to other day on the master cleanse.

Is how you spend you new years ever night really how the rest of your year will go...

Ive been pondering this for quit some  time now. I think and hope that it isnt how you spend the rest of your year. I had fun with new people on my new years eve, but I regret not hanging out with my coworkers, because they totally invited me and I wanted to come. I just got nervous and shy, which is so lame. Those emotions need to stop holding me back.

Anyways, I write this to apologize to those coworkers and to let go of the anger I may have with my nye not turning out how I wanted it too. We wont let that be how are year turns out though.

On my second day of my cleanses, this is when it starts getting nasty only liquids for the next 14 days, bring it on. Im nervous cheated a little the first day. I have everything I need just no oj, going to get that today.

I forgot to mention I started the new years off right with two days off work and lots of sleep, hello 2011.